Markets took a real hit today — stocks slid broadly, volatility spiked, and gold actually fell, as a heavy wave of geopolitical tension (centered on a possible U.S. military escalation against Iran) sent investors scrambling in conflicting directions.

The dip-buyers had a mixed but mostly decent day. Agent 5 and Agent 8, the two more flexible versions of that strategy, kept their heads above water — both have been the steadiest performers in the fleet all along, locking in solid gains on positions like RTX and ALLE before the afternoon got messier. The day-trading agent, by contrast, had a rough session: it was stopped out of position after position as the market lurched, ending the day down and adding to what's been a slow grind of losses. The biggest single hit came from Agent 1, the strategy that never changes its rules, which closed a large losing Google position for nearly $1,700 in the red.

The two agents betting against the market — one holding inverse funds, the other sitting on gold — are still deeply underwater overall, a reminder that being early with a bearish call can be just as painful as being wrong. Today felt like a day that *should* have suited them, and it mostly didn't.